


Fat Bottomed Guys (You Make the Rockin’ World Go Round)

by under_the_blue_moonlight



Series: Intru-love-ical [1]
Category: Cartoon Therapy (Web Series), Sanders Sides (Web Series), Thomas Sanders
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Logan is insecure, M/M, Multi, Remus gives a big fuck you to fatphobes, Remus used flirting through song, These two are just disaster gays, chubby logan, it’s super effective!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2019-09-27
Packaged: 2020-10-29 10:50:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20795447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/under_the_blue_moonlight/pseuds/under_the_blue_moonlight
Summary: Logan wasn’t all too keen with his birthday surprise being a karaoke night at a bar. However, he was very surprised when someone, somehow, seemed to find him attractive, changing the lyrics of a song to show it.





	Fat Bottomed Guys (You Make the Rockin’ World Go Round)

Logan Berry took in the scene before him. A bar was in front of him, music booming from inside. Posters in the windows said that that night, the 7th August, was a karaoke night.

His friends had taken him, Logan “I don’t like to sing” Berry, to a karaoke night for his birthday.

Well, this was just great.

“So…?” Emile Picani smiled from where he was stood behind his friend, waiting for Logan’s reaction.

“I’m not sure you thought this through. I’m not exactly a karaoke person.”

“You don’t need to be to enjoy it,” Remy Sleep replied. “It’s equally as fun to drink a bunch, and just watch your friends and strangers making fools of themselves. It’s what I usually do.”

“But not tonight as you promised you’d sing with me!”

“I know, Em, and I will.”

Ethan Dee Ceitful placed a hand on Logan’s shoulder. “Lo, I promise you’re gonna have fun. Remy’s right, it can be fun even if you don’t sing. Plus, I heard a few people from our college are gonna be here. Might be good to meet some people before tomorrow.”

Logan thought about it for a moment. He guessed meeting some people would be good… and it would be entertaining to listen to music and spend some time with his friends.

“Okay, lets go.”

-

Later, the four of them were sat at a table in the bar, drinks in front of them, and listening to the current song. A guy with tanned skin, red-brown hair, wearing a red crop top and white skinny jeans was currently singing Can You Feel the Love Tonight, seeming to be mostly directing towards to two others sat at a nearby table, one of which was blushing and smiling, and the other had their hood pulled up to hide their face. The third person at the table, who looked near identical to the person singing, only they had a moustache and a silver streak in their hair, was laughing his ass off.

“Hey, how about us four go and join the queue to sing a song?” Emile asked, pulling Logan’s attention back to the conversation.

“Um, no. No no. I thought I didn’t have to sing, and I’m not going to.”

“Hm… Not even if it were Hamilton?” Remy smirked. “Rap and history? I mean… there are four of us. Three Schuyler Sisters and one Aaron Burr.”

Logan considered for a moment, before sighing. “I dunno… I mean, you know how I am in front of crowds. There’s a reason I joined the astronomy club at high school and not the debate club, despite my talent in debating. I just don’t like having so much focus on my bo… on me.”

Emile, Remy and Ethan shared glances, seeming to have a silent conversation. They then proceeded to finish their drinks, before all standing up. Before Logan could ask what was going on, he was pulled to his feet and started to be pulled through the bar by his friends.

“Um, guys, what are you doing?”

“We’re gonna help you get over your confidence issues,” Remy replied as they joined the short queue for the karaoke machine.

“Huh? What, no, I can’t-“

“Lo, you shouldn’t let your body hold you back,” Emile comforted. “There’s nothing wrong with it. It’s perfect the way it is.”

“Wha-what? I’m not insecure about my body…”

None of the others were buying it. Logan sighed. “Okay, maybe I am a little… Okay, a lot. But I don’t think this is going to work. It’s too much at once!”

Ethan shrugged. “It’s best to face your fears before they become a phobia. You got this, Lo. We’ll be up there with you.”

Logan didn’t look so sure. But, unfortunately, he didn’t get long enough to find a good time to run away, as soon, he found himself stood with a microphone in hand, eyes on him and his friends.

Oh god.

Emile was scrolling through the karaoke machine, looking for the song. Eventually, with an “Aha!” he found it. “Ready, guys?”

Remy and Ethan nodded, and Logan took a deep breath. No way he was getting out of this now.

Emile pressed play on the song, and the instrumental of Schuylar Sister began. Ethan came in a moment later, singing Burr’s part. There was a “whoop!” from the crowd, specifically from the guy who had been singing Can You Feel the Love Tonight. Guess he was a Hamilton fan.

While Ethan rapped, Emile whispered, “Lo, you’re Angelica, I’m Eliza, Rem, you’re Peggy.”

Before Logan could protest, he had to come in singing. He took a deep breath as Ethan finished his first part, before coming in.

At the start of the song, he was tense, and held back. But as time went by, he just kept telling himself to pretend he was just singing with his friends and the crowd wasn’t there. He started to loosen up, and stop holding back.

The end of the song seemed like it came too soon. Usually, when he did have to do something in front of a crowd, time felt like it slowed, not sped up.

When the song finished, applause rang out, and Logan smiled… before hurrying off back to the table. The quicker he got out of the limelight the better.

The others followed behind.

“Lo, that was awesome!” Emile grinned. “You were great! Feel more confident now?”

“Not at all.” Logan went to take a seat before pausing. “I probably shouldn’t have the rest of my drink. There’s a chance it’s been drugged.”

“Good call. I’ll get us another round.” Ethan turned and headed to the bar.

“In the meantime, Em, how about we do a duet?” Remy suggested, wrapping an arm around Emile’s waist. Emile giggled.

“Steven Universe? Something Entirely New?”

“Sounds perfect.” Remy pecked his boyfriend’s lips, before the two went back to the queue for the karaoke machine.

And so, Logan was left alone at the table. It may have felt terrible, having his body shown off to everyone as he sung - he should have worn his baggy sweater - but he was glad he did it. Singing with his friends had been fun, as much as he would have preferred they had done it at a karaoke place with a private room.

At least it was something he could knock off the bucket list. He’d done it once, he didn’t need to do it again.

He rolled up the sleeves of his flannel shirt, starting to get a little hot. He didn’t want to take it off so he was just in the tank top he was wearing underneath though. Too exposed for his liking…

He didn’t pay much attention to the singer after they had gone up, but the one after that drew his attention. He recognised the drum beat as the song began: Fat Bottomed Girls by Queen.

However, as the guy started singing, Logan’s whole attention was brought to it. You see, the guy singing got the words wrong. He didn’t sing ‘Fat Bottomed Girls’. He sang ‘Fat Bottomed Guys’.

Logan turned to look at the stage. The guy there was the moustached doppelgänger of the guy who’d sung Can You Feel the Love tonight.

And he was looking right at Logan as he sung.

As the two made eye contact, the singing guy sent Logan a wink. Logan felt his face heating up at this. No way. This was not happening. This guy was not singing about him. He probably just misheard the lyrics, and the wink was probably just an acknowledgement due to making eye contact.

But, nope, as the chorus came round again, and the guy sung the words ‘Fat Bottomed Guys’.

Logan didn’t know what to say or do. This guy was literally flirting with him through song.

Now that Logan thought about it, he’d never been flirted with before. No one was really interested in chubby guys. He had no idea what you were supposed when you’re being flirted with. Run? That seemed like the best option right now, just run away and avoid this whole situation.

Oh no. He couldn’t. The guy had finished the song and was walking up to him.

Logan felt his face getting hotter and hotter as the guy came closer. Oh god, he was really cute. His hair was messy, but it was a messy that actually looked good. His eyes were a bright emerald, and had a slim yet toned frame.

“Hey,” the guy smiled, holding out his hand. “Remus Duke. Nice to meet ya.”

Logan took Remus’ hand, shaking it. “Um, Logan Berry…”

“You know, I must say…” Remus took a seat opposite Logan. “That was the best performance of Schuyler Sisters I’ve ever heard. And I saw it on Broadway. You’re really talented.”

Logan felt his face somehow even heat up even more, like it was going to burst into flames in any second. There was no way this was happening, no way this was real. “O-okay, you can stop now…”

Remus’ eyebrows furrowed. “Stop what…?”

“This! Pretending you think I’m hot or whatever. I get it, ‘haha, look at that guy, he’s fat and lonely, let’s try and get his hopes up and then bring them crashing down so he starts crying and makes a complete fool of himself’. I’ve seen through your charade, you don’t have to keep it up.”

Remus looked horrified at this. “Jesus Christ… Who the fuck’s done that to you in the past? I need their names and addresses so I can knock them out with the morning star I stole from a museum.”

“…What?”

“It’s actually a really funny story. Me, my twin, Roman, and his boyfriends were at the museum, I started to get a little pissed at being a third- well, I guess fourth wheel, actually-”

“No,” Logan cut over him. “Um, sorry, I wasn’t saying ‘what’ to that… though I’m kind of interested now. I meant more, ‘What? You’re actually serious about this?’“

“Well, yeah, of course. I’m only a dick to my friends, not complete strangers. Plus, do you think I’d put in the effort of singing an entire song for a joke?”

Logan shrugged. “One guy went to the effort of pretending to be bi, asking me out to prom, rigging the ballot so I got picked as prom king, and - I can only assume he’d either read or watched Carrie recently - dumped pigs’ blood over me. Claimed it was the ‘last thing I needed to complete my transformation into a pig’. He was arrested, of course, but it’s safe to say, I’m glad to be out of high school.”

“…Jesus.”

“Yeah… You’d think I was the only fat person in school. I wasn’t, I was just the only one who wasn’t confident about my body, so I was an easy target…”

“Gosh…” Remus could hardly believe what he was hearing. “I’m so sorry… You must have gone to a horrible school.”

Logan shrugged again. “It wasn’t the school itself, just the other students. I had good friends to help me through, though.”

“That’s good. And, it makes you feel better, having more body fat doesn’t make you a pig. If anything, I’m the pig. My room has been called a sty on multiple occasions.” He paused as Logan giggled a little. “Nah, body fat just makes you softer, which means you give better cuddles. You’re like a teddy bear! Everyone loves teddy bears.”

Logan smiled a little, blushing. “Thanks..’”He paused. “Oh god, I just realised I’ve been venting my past trauma to a complete stranger… I’m so sorry, I-“

“No, no, it’s okay,” Remus reassured. “I get it. I didn’t exactly have the greatest childhood experiences either. Parents divorced when I was young when my dad realised he was gay. Roman stayed with Dad, Mom dragged me off with her. She was pretty neglectful, so I ended up a little messed up… She couldn’t handle me and dumped me back with dad just before my freshman year. I didn’t fit into the happy trio that was my dad, his new husband, and Roman. I just had to force my way into a gap in the puzzle that didn’t exist… But the point is, I understand your pain, and I don’t blame you for wanting to vent it out.”

Logan smiled a little. “Thanks…” He looked over to the table where Remus’ twin was standing up. “I’m guessing you and Roman managed to find a way to get along again.”

“Yep. Which was, honestly, surprising. I think it’s his boyfriends. Patton’s making him more kind and open, and Virgil’s making him realise dark and edgy can be cool.”

“Remus!” Roman called. “We’re heading off! Come on!”

“What?! But the night’s still so young!”

“And we’re also moving into our dorms tomorrow, we’re heading home!”

“Ugh, fine…” Remus stood up. He grabbed a napkin and pulled a pen from his pocket. He scrawled something down before sliding the napkin to Logan. “Call me, Teddy Bear.” With a wink, he turned and walked off.

Logan watched him walk away, before picking up the napkin. There was Remus’ number, along with a message:

_My Fat Bottomed Guy, you really do make the rockin’ world go round ;)_

_\- The Duke_

Logan smiled, face flushing. He slipped the napkin into his pocket, tucking it in properly so he wouldn’t lose it.

Ethan came back over, drinks in hand. As he put them down, he noticed Logan’s expression. “What’s got you all red in the face?”

“Oh, um, it’s probably just the drinks,” Logan responded. “You know I’m a bit of a lightweight.”

“We’ve been having non-alcoholic drinks. We’re underage.”

“… Right. I’ve been having Coke, and you know I am a sugar lightweight. I’ve probably just got a bit of a sugar high.”

“You have the biggest sweet tooth known to man, you have sugar all the time and never have a sugar high. But you obviously don’t want to tell me the truth, so I won’t pry.”

“Thanks…”

-

Logan looked around his half of the dorm room, fully decorated and all his stuff put away. Yes, this was adequate.

He sat down on his bed. This was going to be his home for the next four years. Well, unless he moved out to live off campus with some friends in later years, which he likely would. It depended how long his he and his friends would be able to tolerate their roommates.

His eyes wandered to his desk. Led there was the note from the night before, Remus’ number as well as the message from him on it.

Logan stood up and stepped over to his mirror. He lifted his shirt, exposing his belly. He poked and prodded at his fat.

What did that man see in him? In this? How on Earth could someone be attracted to him? He was a pig. A whale. A-

“Huh. Well, isn’t this a nice coincidence. Hey, Teddy Bear.”

Logan turned around, eyes widening. His roommate placed the box on his bed before turning back to Logan. Remus smiled. “You know, a crop top would be a good look for you.”

Logan’s face flushed a little, pulling his shirt back down. “You’re my roommate, huh?”

“Looks like it. Which, I must say, is a great turn of events, wouldn’t you say?”

Logan hummed. “If you hadn’t told me yesterday that you often leave your room a pig’s sty, maybe I’d agree with you.”

“Damn! Didn’t know you were sassy as well as cute. And judging by your decor, smart too. You’re the whole package. How has no one snatched you up yet?”

The other boy’s face heated up more. “I guess most people just focus on my exterior instead of my personality. And those who don’t mostly just think I’m a nerd.”

“And those people are asshole,” Remus responded, hanging up one of his posters which appeared to be for a very gory comic book. 

Logan smiled. “Can I just ask… ‘The Duke’?”

“I know. Cool nickname, huh?” Remus replied, causing Logan to roll his eyes. He then continued, “Say, Lo, me Ro, Pat and Virge were all gonna head out tonight. Heard the bar’s having another karaoke night, and all college students get a happy hour deal. Two for one on all drinks. You and your friends oughta come along.”

Logan considered it, before nodding. “Yeah. That sounds like fun. Well, as long as we don’t stay out to late. Classes start tomorrow after all.”

“Sweet. I already can’t wait.”

-

Remus was the first to go up and sing a song that evening when they were at the bar. He and Logan had been conversing happily and getting to know each other better until then.

Now Remus was gone in the queue, he turned to the other conversations at the table. Roman and Ethan were talking about their favourite musicals - turns out they were both theatre majors. Patton and Emile were talking about cartoons, and Remy and Virgil were complaining about their roommates to each other.

The two friend groups meshed together really well, you could hardly tell this was their first days meeting. It was nice to see.

“Looks like it’s Remus’ turn,” Roman pointed out, drawing everyone’s attention to the front of the bar.

Remus scrolled through the songs. He finally found the one he was looking for, selecting it. As the instrumental began playing, he sent a wink to Logan, before singing.

_“I like big butts and I cannot lie!_  
You other brothers can’t deny!  
When a guy walks in with a chubby soft waist  
and a round thing in your face you get sprung!”

Logan’s face burned. He honestly didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. Maybe both.

The others at the table had obviously chosen the first option.

“Damn, Lo, didn’t know you had a secret admirer,” Ethan smirked.

“Wouldn’t exactly say that’s secret,” Virgil replied.

Logan sighed, but couldn’t help but smile.

That mess of a human singing to the room right now would be his roommate for the next few years.

And honestly? Logan couldn’t be happier about that.


End file.
